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Thursday, December 9, 2010

I am occasionally a coward in the meanest, pettiest of ways.

And the things I've done in such a state can't be undone. And yet somehow God still forgives. And yet somehow He still works all things to the good in ways I may never see. That is faith, is trust: He is so much bigger than me, and I cannot bring down His plans. Not for myself, not for others--not ultimately. I cannot ever, wittingly or not (or something in between), defeat His love.

So I place myself in that mercy.

And what is Advent the season of if not trust? Isn't waiting about trust? Our Lady made trust a lifestyle during her Advent.

(Pardon the disconnectedness. I am tired. I am letting myself be braindead tonight. Going to read some Dappled Things and Image now.)